Here We Are Again

It's been far too long since I wrote a poem.

Not one of those cutsie little blurbs that does nothing but rhyme.

But a REAL poem.

From the innermost parts of myself, poured out on paper.

...I've never been good at that.

I spend entirely too long on the format, on the word choice, on the phrasing to actually say something meaningful.

And lately?

So many things have been bouncing around my head.

I tried starting a journal.

...turns out I'm not good at that either.

I just need to write more often. Say outright what comes to mind, not mattering if it fits into someone else's idea of skill.

After all, I should be writing for me, not anyone else.

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry we started our relationship with a termination date.

I'm sorry you moved and left me alone.

I'm sorry for the long calls, and sleepless nights.

I'm sorry for the ridicule you endured because of me.

I'm sorry that the distance began encroaching on our lives.

I'm sorry jealousy overcame me when I couldn't be with you.

I'm sorry it became so serious.

I'm sorry it became so hard.

I'm sorry we decided separating was the best decision.

I'm sorry we didn't work out.

I'm sorry you moved on before I did.

I'm sorry I fell into depression.

I'm sorry I cut all ties when the pain became too much.

I'm sorry that when I healed, things were different.

I'm sorry my heart broke when I heard you were over me.

I'm sorry our friendship was tainted.

I'm sorry when I got over you, you started hurting.

I'm sorry our conversations dwindled into silence.

I'm sorry you asked for some space and time to work things out.

I'm sorry that I completely understood that need.

I'm sorry that I'm relieved we're not going to talk indefinitely now.

I'm sorry I don't know how to fix this.

However. 

I'm not sorry that we started dating.

I'm not sorry for the laughter and smiles.

I'm not sorry for the connection we formed.

I'm not sorry for the fond memories shared.

I'm not sorry for the sweaty hand holding.

I'm not sorry for the sneaky kisses.

I'm not sorry for the slow dances.

I'm not sorry for gazing into your eyes.

I'm not sorry for the elaborate presents.

I'm not sorry for the closeness.

I'm not sorry for the confessions.

I'm not sorry for the happiness.

I'm not sorry I met you.

I could never be sorry for that.